Why don’t they make Boy Diapers and Girl Diapers?
Before Nicholas was born I thought diapers are diapers – right? But I’ve learned that boy whizzers are definitely different from girls’.
Nearly every other morning, Nicholas gets up with big smile, happy to see me. He’s dry as a desert on the back side but his front is sloppy slush.
Ewwwhhh, I love you sweetie but mommy has to change you before your morning hug. Then it’s the strip tease, a dunk in the baby tub and into some clean clothes. Then it’s strip the bed, change the covers and the whole nine yards.
One of my sisters, who also has a boy, says: “buy bigger diapers.” But I’m like – if I buy bigger, then there’s the risk of what happened to me a month ago. I failed to make sure baby couldn’t get to his diaper overnight — that means good snaps, zips, and maybe a pin or two. That night Nicholas decided he wanted to go exploring. The next morning — his dad decided to get Nicholas up to give mommy a break. Instead of playing with our lovely son, he brought Nicholas into our bedroom to play on our bed. Dad of course wasn’t really paying attention to how Nicholas looked at the time. He’s still half asleep. He plops Nicholas in the bed next to me. And suddenly a strong odor hits me.
“Why does he smell like poop? “I ask. “And what’s this brown stuff on his head? – Oh Honey!” Nicholas had decided to smear himself head to toe with his poop. The mattress, the bars and the headboard was a mess. And I broke out the yellow rubber gloves and went to work. That morning the husband was banished to bath duty with moans and groans and lot of “boy — you are a mess.” Meantime I spent a half hour scrubbing on dooty duty.
The bigger diaper solution only provides a bigger possibility of Nicholas number twos escaping from a leg hole …and giving my silly explorer something to smelly to play with.
If anyone has a boy diaper solution to keep a toddler dry all night, I welcome it.
For now, I’ll have to point his whizzer down on the last diaper change of the night and hope for the best.