10 Things I’ve Learned With Nicholas This Year
1. Patience is showing loving care toward one another, but also love to yourself. It forces you to slow down, take time and experience the moments a little more intensely.
2. Look at the good in every situation. When I’m bogged down with deadlines and student complains, Nicholas reminds me to stop and play with his train set or have a sword fight instead.
3. Dance like no one is looking. Nicholas can get hyped about a good song at the drop of a hat. He’ll get up and insist I get up and dance. The wilder and crazier the dance the better.
4. Breathe! Literally take five minutes and focus on breathing. Letting your brain rest without figuring out anything or worrying about what could happen or did happen is a good thing.
5. Create – just because you can. Every day my sweetie grabs crayons, paper, scissors and glue to create his own masterpieces. Sometimes taking a break and creating from the heart gives you that love boost you need.
6. Appreciate the world of nature around you. Nicholas still gets fascinated by a butterfly or ladybug. It reminds me to remember and appreciate the little things.
7. Enjoy your meal. I often would get annoyed at how long it takes my Nicholas to eat. My life for years was just quickly get something down your face and move on to more important things because of a new deadline. These days I try to enjoy my meals – even if the meal is soup and a sandwich, I try to enjoy the time.
8. Ignore other people’s drama by putting up the big mental STOP sign. I’m getting better at not getting hooked into other people’s drama. It’s a skill to be a loving and caring person, but not to take others situations and attitudes toward you personally. It’s best to let those with the negative attitudes alone. You’ll be a whole lot happier.
9. My attitude, thoughts and energy can set the tone. There have been countless times where I am concerned or annoyed by something outside the home and Nicholas will pick up on that energy. He’ll say, “Are you happy mommy!” “What’s wrong!” And then proceed into a spiral or yelling and acting out. But if I stop obsessing, change my focus, my thought and my attitude – the drama subsides. Calm returns. And I find the problem I was worried about usually works out.
10. Prayer and meditation work. Prayer = asking. Meditation = allowing. I’ve learned there is a difference. My religious upbringing often focused on the first and not the last part of the equation. Or perhaps it was my interpretation that they were interchangeable. But I’ve found they are two different things. #1 – asking God is good. But afterwards #2 – let it go and allow the universe to work things out. That means don’t have in your mind how it’s supposed to work out — just that it will work out.